ARMY are you all doing well? 

It’s been a long time since I wrote a letter so it feels a bit awkward but I wanted to deliver my feeling at least through this way so I am scribbling down a few words.

Firstly my first album is released 

I feel that ARMYs who are readIng this also would feel the same way as me but you all are probably thinking “When did he grow up this much?’

“Having a showcase with the heavy dark eyeliner 10 years ago seems like it was just yesterday. The kid who always was just laughing/giggling and causing trouble is now releasing a solo album”

Truthfully I have been preparing for a very long time but because my working speed is slow and I am slow to act in all areas, it got delayed

However as much as it has been delayed I was able to put more thoughts in and was able to prepare it more firmly. 

And although my album is released, I think what holds more importance to me is that between ARMY and Bangtan 10 years have gone by.

During that time, while receiving a lot of memories I grew up alot and with the love I received I grew taller. Although there isn’t a change, the way how I think changed a lot as well

I think I am becoming an adult…

I think I became more firm [as much as I grew up] 

I can see it so well that you all will tease me saying I am still a kiddo and all but still, I grew up a bit didn’t I? My facial hair grows a lot too now keke

Anyways big congratulations on the 10 years

We carry many memories. Together, we have been sad, cried, angry, smiling, happy, and sharing so many emotions. 

I can confidently say that there isn’t a relationship like ours.

Because there are ARMYs there is Bangtan

I/We only sang just for you all. 

Even now one little kid who is part of the 7 has come firmly prepared to try to show off [his skills].

In the future as well. I’ll continue to sing, dance, and promote in a cool manner for a long time for our family, friends, members, and ARMYs whom I love.

Thank you for taking care of me, hugging me, supporting me so I can have courage, and crying, being angry, and being happy together with me for the last 10 years.

Also I’m sorry. I love you all soo so much. I purple you lots

T.H. KIM

‘I am happy these days’ conversations shared with V

‘요즘 행복하다’ 뷔와 나눈 이야기

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translated by bomharu1230

NAMJOON 

ARMYs, hello

I am not sure how many albums, how many letters it has been that I am coming to you with.

10 years, where they say even rivers and mountains change, because I was together with you guys, who gave us generous love to us, my youth was quite very happy, and was able to sparkle.

I believe each of us individually, the company, and even you all went through many changes during these times. It would be a lie to say there was no regret, shame, or disappointment, but what did not change is that every moment, it was my, our fullest.

The reason I, who was lacking and immature, was able to become an adult this much is all thanks to ARMY’s love and sincerity.

My heart/feeling that I try to show, and express for the last 10 years was probably full of inexperience and was lacking but if it was a little bit of help to your piece and pieces in your last 10 years, I am satisfied with that.

It might seem like an end, but I believe that the clock hands just went around once and hit 12 o’clock again.

I still have many feelings that I want to express to you as RM and as Kim Namjoon. 

Wherever, however we are, the thought of wanting to show something nice and good to the world with seven and ARMYs, I hope to go forward without changing. 

I also am looking forward to my and our chapter 2.

Let’s organize the moments that we had to go over once and close it and let’s make many many good memories and put them in the next album. 

Thank you so so much and you’ve all worked hard / thank you all for your effort. 

Hope the past 10 years of 20s can be like a yellow maple leaf that falls out of a dust covered album you open one day. Where you can take it out anytime to look at for the scent and color even if it’s completely dried out. 

I love you

Namjoon

SEOKJIN

ARMY! Hello. This is Jin. 

Looking at the songs in this album, I come to think that we have been running for quite a long time. 

When I listen to songs (I listened to) in the past, I look back reminiscing the times when I was a child, don’t you think there will come a day where you will also look back reminiscing the memories we had together while listening to our music? When it comes to mind sometimes, I will listen to this song and remember the memories I have of the times we had with ARMYs. I hope/wish it can always be a good memory of each other

Al-la-byu ( I love you) 

YOONGI

Hello ARMYs This is Suga 

This album is purely dedicated to you ARMYs. 

I hope you can comfortably enjoy it. 

Thank you soo so much for being with us for the last 9 years. 

Hope there are much more days to be together than the days we’ve been together. 

Thank you. Love you. Truely. 

HOSEOK

ARMYs have you had a good day today? 

It’s j-hope who is always curious to know about your each and every day. 

From being with you guys all this time, I now know so well of your hearts /thoughts thinking about us each and every day. So I also always try my best to spend my day nicely with you guys. 

Our ARMYs who like us exactly the way we are no matter how we look or how we are. Once again I spend the 24 hours of my day, if I were to exaggerate, every minute and second, carrying a thankful heart to our ARMYs. 

Remembering all the process we’ve been through together for the span of almost 10 years, I try to wrap up my day again with you all. 

Love you and Thank you.

JIMIN

Your interests are the biggest influence in our lives. 

Thanks to it I cried, laughed, and was also happy. 

Thanks to it I may have fallen but also been able to feel overwhelmed with emotions that my heart felt full / a lump in my throat (from being touched). 

I also want to be an influence to you as well. 

Thank you so much for being the meaning to my life and love you.

TAEHYUNG

For a time that is almost close to 10 years, I have been writing so many letters solely to the precious people named ARMYs, it’s just a day I miss you even more. 

I am doing well these days, and in the midst of the busy life I am on an adventure to find fun within it. I hope ARMYs can find enjoyable fun inside ARMY’s lives and if you are unable to find it, I will be your happiness. 

Thank you for loving us. I love you more. So much. 

JUNGKOOK

Hello ARMY. It’s Jungkookieee. 

I am curious to know how you are doing by the time you are reading this letter. 

One might be spacing out from going deep into their thoughts, one might be happy from making a good accomplishment, one might be going through hard times, I’m sure there are many (different) people. 

I think I wrote this letter not as BTS Jungkook, but as just a person, as one human Jeon Jungkook, to give a little bit of support/comfort to you. 

I’ve been thinking about this alot lately, I’ve been living with a thought of “the only main character in my life is myself”.

Whatever the situation of the surroundings is, what kind of people are around me, not being swept away by it and protecting my own self, the determination to control my own self, I live trying not to forget those. 

I hope you can do the same. 

Right or wrong, and if it can be good, go for even better, I hope you can go make your world (like that).

You may think “what is he to talk about something like this’ but as I mentioned before just as another human being, I believe I am able to talk to another person like this.

Don’t let your own self down.

A life you only live once, let’s live for yourself. And show that awesome energy to the people around you. If you live like that, perhaps one day it will become a better life?

I’m going to end it here as my handwriting is becoming more of a chicken scratch. Let’s be happy.

Between the past, present, and future, which one do you think of as most important?

Of course it’s the present and it will be the present in the future too. Future (미-mi, 래-rae) comes from “Not yet’” Mi (未) “come” Rae (來), something that doesn’t come immediately, and in the end something unclear. Past is something that has already passed. I believe that we have to live considering the present as most important. I think that if we don’t live in the present, you can’t live in the past or the future also. 

The word “past” what does it mean to you?

When you open an old drawer, due to the air that was trapped in there, there is a hint of musty smell. That isn’t so bad. When I go to my parents’ house or grandmother’s house, or open the drawer in the room that I used to live in the past, I can smell it and there is this thing that wakes me up. It also brings back old memories. I think ‘Past’ is kind of like the smell you smell when you open old drawers like that. You stand from a far and say ‘Oh yea, there was something like this’ that kind of word.

It seems that you think special of the scent of wood.

Even all my drawers are wood drawers. The more you use wood, the more touches it receives, it wears out smoother. I really like the word patina and I like furniture that has its patina intact exactly the way it was. I think that is the characteristic that the material wood has. 

What is your first ever memory?

My first memory is around when I was about three. I remember living on top of a hill where there were a lot of villas and multi-family houses. At that time, my father and mother ran a baby food business. In the evening when my father gets off work or on the weekend, thinking about it now, it was very dangerous. While driving the motorcycle, he would put me on top of his lap and deliver baby food across the hill. Back then it was just fun, it was fascinating too, when you go down a hill there is no obstacle in front of you. I was told that even though it was dangerous he took me around because I liked it so much. I have good memories of that time. 

Is there something you miss from life back then?

Relationships that are made without calculations. A relationship where you become friends by just asking “heard you are so and so who lives at so and so?” When I was young I was able to establish such an equal relationship with one sentence. With the friends that I met at the playground before entering school, I had chicken fights (t/n: a game where you go around eliminating each other with one leg while you hold the other leg up. You are eliminated when the other foot touches the ground) and climbed the jungle gyms. When I was in school, with just one sentence, “I am so and so from the classroom next door, I heard your name a lot.” my friend’s friend became my friend. When I became RM, everyone knew me, people could have stereotypes, so it was hard to create a relationship on equal footing. There was already an asymmetrical part about information about each other. Going through various people, I decided to close the door of my heart. So I have times where I miss those pure equal footing relationships that I met when people didn’t know me well. 

What is your first meaningful place/space?

The computer room that I had when I lived in Ilsan around when I was 13 or 14. In the house there was a separate computer room like a study. It was a small remnant room that would only fit a table and a computer. In that tiny room, I spent most of my time there. I bought a mic for the first time, recorded, and wrote lyrics. I think that room gave me the concept of ‘my own space’.

While living as BTS, do you think there was a change that made Kim Namjoon, as an individual, more clear or faded?

I studied Carl Gustav Jung’s theory and learned about Persona- Shadow-Ego, while doing the ‘LOVE YOURSELF’, ‘MAP OF THE SOUL’ series and talking about the messages of the album.

So as the ideal way of living based on my thinking, I thought that if I live separating my persona, RM of BTS , and myself as Kim Namjoon, I can live a better life. But instead, there were more times when Kim Namjoon and RM was identified as the same, and it found its middle ground and merged. Wanted to project the experience I got as RM onto human Kim Namjoon, and wanted to incorporate the thoughts I had as Kim Namjoon into RM’s music…I’ve been interacting and sharing influences like this. Hoping that one day it can merge a bit more like a lunar eclipse. If there is more overlap, I think I might be better at living this life that isn’t so normal. 

How similar is your usual self in real life compared to the BTS member (you are) shown to the world?

About 70~80% similar I think. I’ve been living a life where I was open about myself. I thought about the risks that the choices would bring but still I tried to share a lot of the things I am experiencing. In a way, keeping it mysterious could’ve been more comfortable. But I wasn’t the type of person who is able to make a character by saying I’m going to create my character. I think I’m just going by my own flow. 

What is “myself as it is” like?

Just a 29 year old who is greedy as others, whether it’s materialistic or its ambition for achievements. A person with a lot of goals and thoughts like ‘I’m going to do even better, going to be an even cooler person.’ I am honest about short term goals and desires but also personally also have a hope of leaving something timeless in the long run. I think I am living while fighting in between those. To do that, it requires so much effort and that’s a bit of hassle for me. But that is also who I am.

Is the current ‘Me’ and the past ‘Me’ different?

It’s very different. In the past I only chased the future, Since I felt that I was unhappy in the present. Now, I have a vision to look at myself. I think I can explain it this way. When something happens I deal with it by looking at it from my own perspective. I think I became a little bit more of an adult. Guess you can say, skills you need as a person living in the society? I think I strengthen myself in those kinds of things.  

Looking back, what was the darkest moment for you?

There are moments that I have mentioned and moments that I didn’t. There were moments that I almost felt like literally going into darkness. The thing that helped me get over it in the end was time. If I don’t lose myself and continue to endure it, that can turn into a blessing in disguise or give a lesson in one way or another. It’s an obvious saying but I don’t think there is a more fair truth than ‘in the end, when time passes, everything will be resolved’. I realized that I can only get out of that dark tunnel if the time passes.  

During the day, what time do you think it’s your time for yourself?

For me, my time is separated exactly into two, time I am alone, and time I am not alone.

In your mind, how old do you put yourself as?

I think I am about 31, 32 now. I think endlessly of how I would look when I turn 31 or 32. I have been doing that since about two years ago. The image changes every time I think about it. I think it’s constantly changing from receiving influences continuously from the environment that is surrounding me. So, at one point, I started not using the word “never” 

Who would be the person that would be able to talk about you well the most?

I think people around me are able to see me well objectively. I don’t know what I say or do unconsciously. Those who have watched me for almost 10 years up-close watched all my dramatic changes. So I think the one who can give the most detailed answer about that kind of person I am would be those who share the same code as me, the ones who are closest to me. I think they would be able to explain about me better than myself. 

It seems that you have a lot of friends that you have spent a long time with.

I did have a lot but I don’t have a lot left anymore. If I think about if it’s really necessary to have a lot, I do think 3 or 4 might be enough. But I also think having an attitude of ‘I have these friends so I don’t really want to meet new people’ is not good in terms of relationships. I believe it’s important to be open about relationships but also think precious and grateful of those with me. Closed but somewhat open, a person who lives in such a flexible way, wouldn’t they be most prosperous. 

What do you like to be called the most?

My family calls me “Joon-ah”, “Joonieya’. I like being called that way because it makes me think of my childhood self. As the ones who sees me completely as human Kim Namjoon is my family. So when I am called this way, it makes me feel ‘I am still immature’ ‘I still have a side of me that is like this’ giving a bit of innocent pure heart.

Which color do you think best describes you?

Blue. Even for paintings, I like blue paintings. Blue is often used as an adjective. In the past, blue was the most expensive pigment. So I think even historically, blue felt special. Due to that reason, it approaches to me a bit more special. In the past, I liked black and white. Blue is the first saturated color that I like. I especially like indigo and ultra marine. So I like artists such as Yves Klein and Kim Whanki who use a lot of blue.  

If you were to put yourself as a scent, which scent would it be?

Not sure. I am not sensitive to scents. But if I were to choose, I like a woody scent that smells like wood. A smell you would smell at Buddhist temples. It’s natural and makes you feel good just enough. I also like the smell of the body lotion I have been using for the last 5 years. People told me that I go well with the scent. 

If there is something in life that is an indispensable existence, what would it be?

I definitely need to have family and friends. If I were to think broadly, nature. I get stressed if I don’t get to see grass, trees, water, or even nature that is human made. Next I need to have books and music. Also need things to do. It’s tiring trying to embrace all of that, but I think I was just born this way.

Is there something you have been constantly telling yourself recently?

“Right now, what do I want to be like?” There are times in life when you are unsure how you want to be shown right now. Have lot of those moments. To choose the choices that fit my standard, I think a lot about those thoughts. On the contrary, that worry can make me anxious.    

How fast in km do you think you are going right now?

60~70 km? Speed that is not too slow, not too fast. Cars go and stop, go and stop. They would drive 100km on the freeway, and go 50 km locally. Like that, I have times when I speed up myself, and times I get dragged. Wonder how many people would solely go by their own speed, unless they are living on a deserted island. 

Do you have a belief that you uphold firmly?

‘Empty vessels make the loudest sound’. Based on my observations, your inner self needs to be full. Whether it is a person, a job, a direction, or an opinion, if your inner self isn’t full there are times it feels like there is no essence. Even in short phrases, it feels like essence contains a whole thunderstruck inside. My talks tend to get long since I am still young and my thoughts are not organized (laugh), people who I respect or admire tend to only talk about the main point. They must have put so much thought into putting the core point in such short words. I don’t believe that I am putting my belief into action. I am still young so I do think it is still ok to be a bit noisy. However, in the future, I’m saying I want to be a person who isn’t noisy to myself. 

If there is something you are focusing on these days, what would you say it is?

Visual art and music, I am focusing very hard one those two. At its core there is intellectual play. For me, intellectual play is very big. Studying isn’t fun but that’s also why I started.  

Art history is very vast and long. If you get into art history, you need to know about architecture, philosophy, history, and also literature. So as a result you have to learn a lot of culture. Thing with history is that it is a mixture of correct answers and wrong answers which makes it more interesting. 

I think that if I follow all those histories like art history one by one, there might be truth that penetrates the period. Liking visual art is continuing to do my own mental training. Even decades after an artist’s death, if you stand in front of their work, it would still give the full excitement from the person’s expression that is still alive. And I often think that artists are like a fighter who fights in solitude alone. Music gives joy of immediate reaction. It’s a complete different type of joy, 

Is there a thought you always think about before going to sleep everyday? 

If I can’t go to sleep quickly, the only thought that comes to my mind is ‘I really need to sleep right now.’ Then I continuously think, ‘It’s going to be a problem if I don’t go to sleep right now ‘ a lot. But honestly if I was thinking this at 3 am? Then it’s already over. (laugh) I would be able to sleep if I didn’t think about those thoughts. I think humans are so weak. Since they aren’t able to get out of it if they start thinking about one thing. So I would force myself to drink a little bit of alcohol or shower. That is how I try to relax my body.

When you think of the word ‘Dream’ what is the first thing that pops up in your mind?

Miyazaki Hayao’s <Castle in the Sky>. I really like this movie. When I watch that, it makes me think that the place I want to live is there. “I am going to accomplish something when I am 40” Honestly those things, it doesn’t really matter to me whether it comes true or not. What’s more important is the thought of ‘I have a dream’ That’s good enough. I think dreams are like <Castle in the Sky> or like a heat haze you see from afar.  

Are there any characters from a movie or a drama that you would like to resemble?

I want to live like the main characters from Miyazaki Hayao’s animation. Not that I want to live in a fairy tale but I want to live with having something child-like. I guess I am socially mature but still want to be a child who hasn’t been spoiled yet. In <Thus Spake Zarathustra>, Philosopher Nietzsche describes the 3 stages of the human mind: camel, lion, and child. A child in that sense. I want to live like a child who can live satisfied everyday without being jealous of others. I think I might have too much greed to become like that though but to at least be somewhat like it, I am practicing to speak it out. 

If you were to look at life as one road, how far do you think you came now?

I think I just barely went over one hill out of many other hills. Life is so long, I have a long way to go. They say people now live about 130 years, then that means I have to do something for the next 100 years that is left, So I feel like I just went over one hill.

If there is a door at the end of this road that you are passing, what do you think is behind the door?

The door is probably ‘30 years old’. Honestly I am scared of what’s behind the door. I feel like there would be something that even though I am afraid of it now, if I go past it it won’t be much. For example, the interest on us would go down, then the baton would be passed to somewhere which I am afraid of. Because I don’t want to let go of it. Once I let go of it it wouldn’t be big of a deal but I am afraid. It’s not that I would suddenly fall somewhere but just another step will open. Even so, I guess because I am a human, while being afraid, I am also waiting for it.

Do you think you are currently standing in a crossroad of change?

I have always been at a crossroad of change. I just think that I don’t know where this change will take me. So I put my best effort into the present. I feel like if I try my best to indulge in the things that I love right now, this would take me somewhere again someday. 

Do you believe there is a predestined fate?

There are times when it’s good to believe that there is fate and times when it’s good to say that there isn’t such a thing as fate. I am believing it just enough. I think it’s too cruel to day there are none, I just think there is probably something like it. 

If you were to make a documentary about yourself, which song do you want to put on ending credit?

There isn’t one yet. I think it’s normal that there isn’t one. Since I believe that there is so much of me left still, there isn’t one. I need to live in the present. But if there is a deadline in my life and I was told that I need to make ending credits, that my movie is over, then I will have to make one. While saying “Wow, how am I going to do this!” (laugh)

What are three key words that can define you?

WORK, LIVE, BALANCE. Exactly just these three. The most important one is balance. I always think about balance. I try my best to balance out these three.

When was the “Moment of Proof”?

Until now, I think I lived clinging to the word “proof’. So in a way I thought it was unfortunate because there is no end to proving. The moment I think that I have proved myself , people will agree with it and immediately require a new proof. So I think that proof is unsubstantial. Whether we get no.1 on Billboard Chart, receive big awards, for some that still doesn’t prove it. Looking back, the moments that I thought ‘if I just do this, it will prove it’ did not prove anything at all. In the end, no matter how much I think about it, I don’t think I had a specific ‘Moment of Proof’. For me, just starting music was the start of proof, the moment I became BTS, all those moments were a moment of proof.

Not to the world but is there something you want to prove to yourself?

There is a lot. If I can look back later and see that I did more things that were good than harm to the world while being born on this earth, I think that would be a kind of proof to myself. I think while living, just by eating and trashing we are doing a lot of harm to this planet. But if I can inspire people through things I do, maybe that can give a room for offset a little. Whether it offsetted or not, I’ll know when I look back later. If I don’t have big regrets, if my feelings are a bit comfortable, then I think that’s the moment I proved to myself.   

Do you tend to put effort in trying not to be swayed by the world’s standard?

Although the standards of the world are changing fast, I think there are truths that don’t change. Realistically, if I were just trying to adapt to the changing world it would be too difficult. But I don’t think I can earn the truth easily. Truth is something you can get by paying a valuable price like time and effort, and also you have to learn it yourself. I believe I’m going by following milestones of respectable adults that I put as role models. So I think it’s ok to be swayed a little.

Personally, what is the most meaningful album out of the whole BTS discography? 

I think members would all answer the same but <LOVE YOURSELF 轉 ‘Tear’>. First reason is, this album could have been postponed indefinitely or could have been not released at all due to internal circumstances. Second, I know this album has received the best reviews from the critics, not that ratings are important but it’s an album that we put our soul into each song and people recognized it. At that time, there were a lot of lyricists competing and I wrote fiercely so I wouldn’t fall behind. Like its name, it’s an album written with tears. And because this album exists we were able to move onto the next. 

If there was a song that was most difficult in <LOVE YOURSELF 轉 ‘Tear’>, which one would it be?

‘Outro : Tear’. It was a unit song and this song’s production was difficult. The recording was difficult as well. It was the song that required the most soul. A song that is possible if you were fully immersed into it. With the same meaning, ‘FAKE LOVE’ went the same as well. Rapping was hard. Honestly there wasn’t a song in that album that was easy.

Intro: Persona

What does this song mean to you?

It’s the song I wrote most honestly. I wrote thinking much and without being bound to anything. So I think it may be the lyrics that are like myself the most. If I look at it now, there are parts that are not so good but back then I had no choice but to put those words. If it was now I would write it differently. 

What is your favorite part of this song?

The last chorus lyrics. “Persona, who the hell am I, I just wanna go I just wanna fly’ It’s a lyric with nothing. But back then, it was like that. That was it. ‘I just wanna go I just wanna fly’ is a lyric even an elementary student can write. But other than that there was nothing to write and that was very fun. There were other good words but there was nothing better than that which could explain my feelings the best. I think it’s the most ‘child-like something’ that I am after.

In the lyrics is there a part that hits you differently now?

Now I feel distant from the entire song. This song is a trace of that time. If you tell me to write this song again now, I don’t think I would choose a difficult beat like that. I think I would write it bluntly. With a little more refined and filtered lyrics. Back then, I think the raw feeling itself was the best choice.

What can your persona of now tell your persona of that time? 

I don’t think I would be giving any advice. Just, “Do what you wanna do” about this much. If you interfere with the history it can mess up, so you have to just stay still. That is the truth. 

If there is a persona of you that you want to show in the future what would it be?

Music with the timelessness that can be heard over time regardless of the trends and that kind of me. For example Yoo Jae-ha, Kim Kwangseok sunbaenim’s songs are contemporary even if you listen to them right now. Even if the sound quality is a bit poor it still doesn’t sound like an old song. This kind of song resonates the same for the younger generation. I believe art is the same. If you were to ask what contemporary art is, for example, for me, Monet or Gogh is contemporary. I don’t mean to say ‘I like things from the past’. Of course, right now, I try to see a lot of works that are being produced at the same time. Since I want my contemporaneity to continue even after time passes. So I have my own definition and contemporary music that I want to make. A grand persona is easy to make a fuss, so there is a possibility that it’s an empty vessel (laugh) but if these empty vessels continue, one day something that is full will come out.

If you were to release a part 2 of this song, what would you choose as a title?

Since all my personal work that would be released in the future would be all my story in the end. So all the songs will be part 2 and 3 of Persona. In other words, all the songs will be the persona of that time.  

Stay

What does this song mean to you?

This song is a special song for me. During the planning stage, there were many other candidate songs that had a different vibe than the current song. The title of the song was also ‘Whatever’. But this song came out based on the melody and lyrics Jungkook wrote in a different direction. In the end, it became a better song and got recognized by others. Since the song was made during such a confusing time, I think the emotions of that time melted into it well. As a result I think it’s a ‘good’ song.

Is there a personal standard for a ‘good song’?

I think the standard is me. ‘Eternity’ is one of the criteria, and there are songs that still have a certain smell or inspiration even after the time passes. I think that is a good song. 

Is there a point that adds more charm because the song is a unit song of RM, JIN, and JUNGKOOK? 

First, it’s a song in which Jungkook wrote all the melodies, so I think it was able to show another charm of Jungkook very well. Also the combination of me, JIN, and JUNGKOOK is a combination that we have never tried before so it’s more special. 

It’s a song that was made during the pandemic, is there something new that you realized at that time? 

I realized a lot of things but now I can’t remember. Now that the pandemic is coming to an end, the thought that it’s really nice to have a daily life comes up to me big. Daily life during the pandemic wasn’t something I chose, it was chosen. 

What does the pandemic period mean for you now?

Going through that time, my own personal time has increased physically, and I have been able to think and reflect a lot. So I now have a clearer direction in how I want to live. It’s ironic but I can say it was a compass like time.

Going through that period, if there was something that comforted you the most what would it be ?

Exhibitions and books that I have seen as much as I wanted. When I was busy, I lived with the books out of my hands but after the pandemic I piled up the books and started reading again. It was also nice to be able to spend longer time with my friends. As a result, all the times that I was able to live completely as Kim Namjoon, and not RM, has comforted me.

Is there something new that you have discovered about yourself recently?

That I am a multifaceted person. I like this and I also like that. I like Monet’s work and I also like Yun Hyong-Keun’s artworks. So the people who I feel are interesting and amazing, are those who say ‘I have found my own path’. When I see people who have somewhat defined themselves, I am curious and want to talk to them. Another thing is the yearning for what I create to be a work that can be hung anywhere for a long time. Recently I went to The Museum of Modern Art and saw Cy Twombly’s work and it caught my heart. Guess you can say, non-verbal aura? But in the end, the reason I was able to discover the new side was because the work was hung somewhere for a long time and I was able to look at it continuously. I have newly discovered that, that yearning was firm.

What does the album <Proof> mean to BTS?

I would say probably the album that wraps up season 1. At one point you have to put an end to one thing and that moment is right now. Some might feel sad but we are closing it with our own hands and opening a new door again with our own hands. I think that is meaningful.

Between the past, present, and future, which one do you think of as most important?

I think of the present as most important. More than past or the future, the present will be able to tell me how I am and my current place the best. I can’t hold on to the past or the future but the present is the time that I am going through right now. I feel that if you pay attention to the past and the future, you would end up missing the things that are important right now. So, I think the present is the most important. Also I think the present can change a lot based on how I view the world and the worries that allow me to go forward and the stress is all here in the present. So I want to say present. 

The word “past” what does it mean to you?

Memories and the start. Since all the experience I have right now all started from the past. Concerts, award shows, songs I have sang, everything….

When you think of “past”, what kind of emotion do you feel?

It’s a feeling that you have met someone after a long time. This soft feeling. It feels like meeting your elementary school friend after many years. 

What is your first ever memory?

When I was young, I lived with my grandmother and grandfather. I think my first memory is having a stroll with grandmother and grandfather in the park and having fun. Thinking about my childhood makes me miss my friends who I’ve hung out with during kindergarten. 

What is your first meaningful place/space?

My own personal room I’ve gotten for the first time. It was when I was living in the dorm at Hannam-dong. I think it was meaningful because it was the first time I got a personal room at the dorm. 

In your mind, how old do you put yourself as?

30 year old. As I entered the adult world earlier than others, I didn’t have time to enjoy the various feelings and emotions that only you can have when you are a student. Also learned about the real world around the first year of high school. So I feel that I’ve grown faster in some parts. It is somewhat saddening. Thinking about those, I feel that my age inside is staying at an older age than what my real age is. 

While living as BTS, do you think there was a change that made Kim Taehyung, as an individual, more clear or faded?

Life as Kim Taehyung I believe has faded. But life as V has gotten a lot more clear instead. There were more times I’ve spent as V so there were more things I thought and focused as V. I think there was not enough time to focus on living as Kim Taehyung. So I am trying to find something about me as Kim Taehyung even if it’s reckless. Also even if my color is not vivid. I believe that unclear color is also pretty so I don’t tend to purposely try revealing myself. I want to become vivid naturally. 

If there was an effort you have put for Kim Taehyung and V to ‘coexist’, what would it be?

For the two to coexist, I tried to make them into two different people. I left Kim Taehyung as it is as there are personalities of mine that I can’t avoid. As for V, I tried to show my different side or another self. To express that I put iron plate on my face (laugh) I gave distinction and tried to show two different side

How similar is your usual self in real life compared to the BTS member (you are) shown to the world?

When standing as BTS on stage it’s a little bit different, but at least I think the image shown in the variety show is identical. 100%. Shooting a variety program called <Run BTS> I think I showed myself exactly how I am a lot. I think even right now I continue to show my real self with no embellishment. 

What is “myself as it is” like?

Honest. I don’t like talking things around. If there is something I want to do, or talk about, I tend to do it right away. 

Is the current ‘Me’ and the past ‘Me’ different?

There are parts that have changed. The past ‘me’ was just bright and liked other people. Now I have more concerns and my thoughts have deepened. Liking people is still the same. But if there’s any change, I now like ‘my people’. It also takes a long time to recognize that a person is “my people’ when I meet them. 

Looking back, what was the darkest moment for you?

I think during ‘FAKE LOVE’, it was the darkest moment. I don’t think I was able to overcome the song myself. The reason I was able to withstand that, despite it, was thanks to ‘time’. The time became light. There was a moment when my direction of thinking process changed gradually over time. It didn’t change at once like flipping a coin, but gradually, very slowly. 

If you were to write a letter to yourself in the past, what would you want to write?

I’m going to write, ‘You already have the answer’. I want to tell him “The answer that you were thinking is already out anyways so don’t be confused and struggle with the process”. When I was on the path to choose and I had no confidence in myself and was confused, I constantly remembered the thought and thought about it a lot. But when I think about it, the path I chose and the answers were already inside me. There was no need for me to be confused about it but I was so confused which is the most regrettable part of me in the past. With that being said I want to write a letter like that. 

Who would be the person that would be able to talk about you well the most?

My people. The people around me who I am the closest to. 

If there is something in life that is an indispensable existence, what would it be?

Temperature of heart/mind. I think it would be scary if the temperature of the heart disappears. I feel that if I can’t feel the temperature and can’t tell the difference between warm and cold, I won’t be able to recognize my own people and I won’t be able to distinguish between good and the bad.

Is there something you have been constantly telling yourself recently?

I say “Ah, I’m bored” the most.

How fast in km do you think you are going right now?

The car dashboard you will read 100km but feel like going 2000km? The reason why 100km is on the dashboard is because I am still busy. The reason why the speed feels like 2000km is because I am still a laid-back person. I am far from the type of person who is busy. So, everything feels faster than what it really is. But now that I think about it, 2000km sounds too fast so should I say 500km? (Laugh)

Is this speed something you set or a speed you are following?

I think it’s the speed that I am following. Life as BTS in general goes around fast. There are a lot of stage/performances and lots of other things we have to do. So gratefully we are receiving so much love and to return that thanks we are going at really fast speed. As BTS has to work hard at the current progress, even if the pace is a little different from my personality, I try to match it to that. I think members would be the same.

If there is something you are focusing on these days, what would you say it is?

I have a lot of interest in jazz. The atmosphere itself is also very nice. For me, when I listen to jazz-style music, I feel like I am being loved by music. I feel that feeling a lot. It’s also a part that comforts me. There are many songs in jazz that make me feel that way. 

Do you have a song you would like to recommend?

I want to recommend an artist named Etta James. I feel like it’s telling me “you’ve worked hard” through music. So, when I am alone at home, inside the car alone after work I listen to these Jazz music and get comforted. When that happens I think that music is really amazing. I am really happy that there is music that comforts me and music that loves me. 

Which color do you think best describes you?

Red. I like the intense/fierce feeling. Even in red there are many different colors within it. Those colors all have different vibes but just one thing, the ‘fierce/intense’ feeling is always included no matter what. I want to have that variety of fierceness. I put a lot of effort into showing various sides of me.

If you were to put yourself as a scent, which scent would it be?

It’s hard to pick one since I have a lot of scents that I like. I think there is no answer to it because the smell I like keeps changing. But I would like to be a person who smells like the scent that the other person likes. 

What is something that has changed and hasn’t changed as time passed?

I had struggled when I was young because I couldn’t handle the work that I was doing, now I try to enjoy it while doing it. There are times where it does go well as I thought, but I make myself determined to enjoy things even if the things I am doing are a bit difficult. 

Do you have a belief that you uphold firmly?

I got to be healthy for the people who love me, is a belief I hold. In the past, I didn’t think taking care of my health was important so I can’t say that I upheld it firmly but these days I think about my health as a priority no matter what. I realized that if I get hurt or something in concerts, in the end I can’t show what I wanted to show. So, I put health as number one priority and try not to get hurt. 

During the day, what time do you think it’s your time for yourself?

2-3AM. I feel it’s completely time for myself. It is also the time when I am not working. The time I am able to wrap the day is about 2 am. I can also say it’s time for Kim Taehyung.

Is there a thought you always think about before going to sleep everyday?

Before, every time I went to sleep I said to myself ‘today let’s try to get more than 7 hours of sleep’. When I had insomnia, I mainly thought, ‘I need to sleep’. I also think it’s because it was during when I had a lot of morning schedules. Because of this thought, ‘I have to sleep now so I can wake up early’, I couldn’t fall asleep even more, and that bit its tail after another and continued. Now I don’t have many thoughts. Now that my insomnia is gone, I like the little things that I do in the early morning hours. I think about, let me apply some lip balm, let me go to sleep after having one more sip of water, let me read some webtoons, let me turn on some YouTube of wood burning. These days, since I don’t have a lot of morning schedules I do little things that I need to and move as the flow goes and naturally go to sleep without being worried about time.

Out of the dreams you had recently, are there any that are memorable?

In my dream, I went to the beach with 8-9 people who I am close with. We walked on the shore together, played volleyball, and played dodgeball. Then, I am being serious, but all those people got eaten. Typically when you are in the ocean, you would get eaten by creatures like sharks. Unbelievably they got eaten by clams, some got taken away, some disappeared, and stuff. I also suddenly got eaten and became a ghost. It’s a dream that I had recently which made me think ‘What was that, what kind of dream is this?’.

How did you feel in the dream?

It was really funny. I was able to somewhat feel that it was a dream because there was no way I could think that it was real. So even in the dream I was like “what is this?” and had fun. When I laugh in my dream, I have some kind of feeling that I don’t want to wake up from it. To be honest, dreaming is something I usually forget what it was about just after 5 minutes passes, but it’s fun and I like when dreams are fun.

If you were to look at life as one road, how far do you think you came now?

I believe that I haven’t even come half way. If you were to say that a life is about 100 years, I am 28 years old so I am a little past quarter of my life. Since I haven’t come very far there are a lot of things I want to do in the future, and a lot of things I want to prove. I don’t want to predict what is at the end of this road and just go for it and also not even one chapter of my life ended. I think if I wrap up about one chapter, I will know what I want to do, and the perspective of how I look at life will be more clear.

What are three keywords that would be able to define you?

Love, Health, and Happiness. I can’t think of any other words than those because for me love is important, happiness from love is important, and to repay those I love or those who love me I need to be healthy. I believe those three are something I must have.

Do you believe there is a predestined fate?

I have always believed that destiny was real. There will be multiple paths to choose from but there is only one direction that I want to go to. I believe that the group, BTS will be part of my life whatever happens, even when I hit my 50s or become a grandpa. In that sense, I believe that fate is real.

Are there any characters from a movie or a drama that you would like to resemble?

Thomas Shelby from <Peaky Blinders>… please watch it. The mood is no joke. There is something that I cannot express… something that I can’t describe. I will make sure to show you one day and I plan to do so! I will show you when time passes a little more.

If you were able to go to another dimension, do you have any place you would like to go to?

I want to stay here. The people who are precious to me are here. So my priority is making good memories with these people.

If you were to make a documentary about yourself, which song do you want to put on ending credit?

I am making my “All-time song”. It will be finished one day. The title, I feel that I might change it after saying but under the premise that it’s a temporary title, it’s ‘Color’.

Personally, what is the most meaningful album out of the whole BTS discography? 

<LOVE YOURSELF 轉 ‘Tear’>. The time I was working on this album, I was struggling the most and it was also difficult. I feel like it’s an album that I couldn’t overcome in many ways. So it’s also an album that always remains as homework for me. 

Now how does the album feel like?

When I hear this album, I still remember the struggles I had at that time. I think the emotion and the feeling is still exactly remaining. I also think that I wasn’t able to pull off the song “FAKE LOVE’ itself properly.

When was the “Moment of Proof”?

When the song I wrote got chosen and released for the first time. Staying with people who work on music, I naturally started working on music as well and with luck, that got chosen. So my first work was able to be released into the world. You don’t know how excited I was. Thinking about it now, I think that was my “moment of proof”.

Not to the world but is there something you want to prove to yourself?

I want to grow. I want to be a person who can constantly grow. I want to show myself that I am constantly growing and want to see the end of the growth. 

Singularity 

What does this song mean to you?

Actually, it’s a song that I met at a time when I was in deep thoughts and confusion between Kim Taehyung and an artist named V. Now that I have overcome that period, the song has a special meaning as it feels like it’s a song from that time which became a footstep of when I was able to accept myself as Kim Taehyung, and as an artist named V. 

Like in the ‘Singularity’ comeback trailer, if the face inside the pond talked to you, what would you be saying?

I am not good at games like “Whisper challenge’. So, no matter what I say, I don’t think I would be able to understand it. (Laugh)

Is there a ‘different face’ that you want to show?

I believe that I continue to show a different side based on the song and the stage. So through the song, I made another conscious for the stage as close as possible within the given role in the song. I really love and like (seeing) the changes based on songs in vibe, walking style, power from the eye. I think those are my other different faces. Every time a new song comes, I show a new ‘Me’. I hope you can watch those moments very well. 

00:00

What does this song mean to you?

It’s a song I listen to a lot. The melody is nice and the lyrics are really good. I especially like 00:00’s time. 

When you are having a difficult day, how do you comfort yourself?

I try to empty my head and not think about anything. To clear my head, I would play games, watch movies, drink a glass of alcohol, or have a chit chat. I try to do something where I can focus on one thing. 

What is something that comforts you the most?

Just that I exist together with my people gives me comfort and solace.

Is there something you have newly discovered about yourself?

I think I go well with whiskey. These days I mix whiskey and tonic water and drink it. It’s delicious. It’s nice that I don’t get headaches or hangovers. Before I only drank wine. Whiskey is, to be honest, it’s been exactly 10 days since I started drinking whiskey, (laugh) and it’s good as a wrap for the day. The day I drank whiskey for the first time, it was about 7 am and it snowed. It was sleeting so I opened the curtain for a brief moment and it was really nice that it snowed. Also, I think I like seeing the moon outside of my window. When I drink, I turn off the light for a moment and look at the mood that has risen over the Han River if I think that I’m going to get a little tipsy. It’s really pretty. So there is a song titled “소등” (Lights out) and I don’t know where the file went. It’s such a shame. 

What kind of emotional state are you in during 00:00?

It depends on each day. There are times when I am excited, some days when I am bored…usually during those hours I play online games with my acquaintances. It’s like a wrap of the day. When work is over, come home, and get on the game, the older brothers all are playing games. Then I say “I’m here” and we all play games. We meet online, sometimes meet up in person and hang out. The feeling at that moment is “it’s fun”.

How about just imagining that the time stopped for just one day? What would you do if you were in the situation where you were the only one conscious and able to move?

I think I would try to wake people up. “Hey! Wake up! What are you doing here!” like this.

What does the album <Proof> mean to BTS?

<Proof> is an album that organizes one tempo, if you were to look at it in a bigger view, one season for me. I think the best description would be, an album that wraps up one stage in the big life of BTS. It’s that important but I also think it’s actually hard to put such a big meaning to it also. But if we were to put a meaning to it, you can think of it as a timing to all catch their breath for a short moment.(Laugh)

Between the past, present, and future, which one do you think of as most important?

My thoughts change from time to time. I feel it’s at a time where my thoughts change if a day passes. Just a while ago I put my attention in the past and tried to change something. Next I thought about the future. What should I do in the future, what would be our team’s future. But what comes back in the end is just present. So, I’m trying to live with how the flow goes, matching the footsteps with the present. I also need things like “trust with nothing in return”, “hope”, “courage”. Something that I have always talked about in lyrics 

The word “past” what does it mean to you?

For me it’s blood and flesh. Many things that I have experienced, things that sinked into my skin have piled up. Something I cannot forget and parts that I must have. 

Is there something you miss from your childhood?

I think I miss things that I have not been able to experience. I wasn’t able to experience common things like field trips or school trips. I wasn’t able to go to both middle school and high school graduation. Things I gave up for my dream, I miss it and it’s a little bit saddening. It’s a dream you can only wish for as a student. Back then I was happy that I didn’t need to go to school but now that it has passed, I would like to experience it. 

What is your first meaningful place/space?

When we lived in dorms, I never had a room for myself. I always shared a room with my friends, especially with Jimin. The most meaningful place for me is our first dorm. It felt like a nest for rappers a little. The odd emotions, the excited feelings, interesting experiences, that I felt living in the environment where I lived with others, all that is mixed in and living within the place called dorm. Coming up to Seoul for the first time and till right before debuting, a lot of people went by that dorm. If I think back I wonder to myself if I ever had time where I can have real talks and share thoughts with so many people. At that time, I talked and practiced with friends around my age everyday. Sent off someone again, I also said goodbye and left, and then came back. 

In your mind, how old do you put yourself as?

My age in my heart is going just as my age is. I don’t think I put myself younger than myself nor do I think that I feel older than how I am. If I gain a year, I feel that my mind also becomes as mature. 

When was the “Moment of Proof”?

I would say probably the debut stage? I thought that I had proved myself on the first stage that I stood after preparing so much and going through so much effort. 

Not to the world but is there something you want to prove to yourself?

The part that I would like to prove myself is, would I be able to keep what I have said. The optimistic messages I have told people. I am curious to know when real trials, ups and downs, and hardships come to me, whether I would be able to keep that up. I have a fear of it. “Would I be able to keep everything I say? Perhaps I have a contradiction?” To try to break that fear, I would like to go to the moment of hardship that might come in the future and prove to myself.

While living as BTS, do you think there was a change that made Jung Hoseok, as an individual, more clear or faded?

At first there were no boundaries between Jung Hoseok and j-hope. I think it’s because I myself am a positive (person). So, I thought there was not much difference between Jung Hoseok and j-hope. These days I am trying to pull Jung Hoseok, the individual more. I feel that, that way I am able to make my own resting place and be able to rest properly when I get back from work. Guess I can say another small space? It gave me motivation and strength. Loosened my nervousness and I’m more comfortable. So I am trying to make it more clear. One interesting thing is, as I make Jung Hoseok the individual more clear; I learned that I am not a type that feels really comfortable meeting people actually. I think extrovertness may have been strong. It might have changed that way because I was active for a long time as j-hope, and as a person named j-hope.

How similar is your usual self in real life compared to the BTS member (you are) shown to the world?

I try to mentally separate it but it’s the same person after all. So it can’t have that much difference. I think about 70~80% similar. What I feel the most similarities is that as an individual and as a BTS member, I put a lot of effort into how I look. When I go out, when I am meeting people, even when I am alone, it doesn’t change. 

Is the current ‘Me’ and the past ‘Me’ different?

As a person, a lot of things have changed. The ‘past’ me had no time to think or anything. There were things I learned as time passed, learned life through people, and became mature. But, one thing that has not changed is my passion for work. That isn’t going to change. I still like music, feel bliss when I show something cool, that is constant. The moment I feel the most passion and bliss is when I perform on stage. It’s very clear that I am able to enjoy and have fun while doing it. 

Looking back, what was the darkest moment for you?

I am affected by people around me so rather than having hard times because of my own self, I tend to go through hard times when others go through hardship. When members are having hard times I also feel hardship and at the same time gain strength from members. Of course when I am going through hard times, fans pop into my head the most. When I’m going into the dark, I think about the enormous love I am receiving. That’s how I recover. 

If you were to write a letter to yourself in the past, what would you want to write?

I don’t want to inform a lot of things to the ‘past me’. I’m worried that something might change. If I had to write it, I want to say, just live as you are. Because there is Jung Hoseok and j-hope from the past, I am here currently and there will be a future me. I want to send it like “Hey, just live. Just try once.”

During the day, what time do you think it’s your time for yourself?

From 10 pm to 3 am is real time of my own. I am the type that strictly separates business and private matters. I don’t even have music equipment at home. Home is a rest place. Since I have separated that way, usually when I get home after work, it’s about 10 pm. I wash up and do other stuff. It becomes around 3 am after I use my phone in bed, do some internet shopping, and search things. The rest of the time, I think I try hard to live my life. 

What situation and place do you feel like yourself the most? 

I feel like myself the most when I am working hard. I tend to get nervous when I am not working. So, I think I feel like myself the most when; I am doing something productive, working hard and everything is going busy. That way the personal time I have mentioned earlier is more meaningful. 

Who would be the person that would be able to talk about you well the most?

I think only myself will know. However, honestly speaking there are some parts that I, myself have questions about myself. So I also want to know more about myself. There are parts that I want to hear answers to. From myself.

What do you like to be called the most?

Oftentimes, I am called by nickname of my stage name “hobi” a lot and it’s fun and I like it. There are many times when fans and people around me call me ‘hobi’, and I also feel friendly. 

If there is something in life that is an indispensable existence, what would it be?

People around me, including fans, are of course indispensable. Looking at Micky (companion dog) I thought about animals. Although animals are different from humans so we can’t communicate but, you can say we can communicate through the mind? There is a thing like that. You can really commune. There is comfort and energy that various living things give me. So, I feel like animals are indispensable. I can clearly understand why people raise animals like dogs and cats. 

Is there something you have been constantly telling yourself recently?

“You, you are feeling grateful and thankful every moment in your life, right?” I throw that question out a lot because I live such a meaningful life. If I don’t throw these questions to myself, I am scared that I would take this life for granted. I should live with a thankful and grateful heart that’s not for granted. Also need to live with a vocation. 

How fast in km do you think you are going right now?

Just about 2-3 years ago I think I was going at 180km. Back then, I stepped on the accelerator and drove saying “Let’s just go!” Now, I am going about 120km, while looking around my surroundings and being aware of the speed I am going. If there is a need, I would slow down as well. Thinking back, I think there were some dangerous moments when I was going at 180km.

If there is something you are focusing on these days, what would you say it is?

I think there is only music. I am currently focusing on music. When I say that I am currently focusing on music, it sounds grand and looks like someone who has been doing music for a long time. So I feel embarrassed and shy but as it’s a part that I am lacking on, I am focusing on music to produce a better result.  

Which color do you think best describes you?

Mint color. It’s cool and refreshing. It feels like me and I think the color that best describes me is mint. 

Is there something that you put effort into to make your color more vivid?

To make my own mint color more vivid, I try to add another layer. For example, taking care of myself, going to work out, I think is one of those efforts. Also, I constantly listen to music and make an environment that will allow me to think on my own of what I want to do. Since I also like fashion, I try new things to make myself more vivid.

Is there a thought you always think about before going to sleep everyday?

I think about what I need to do the next day. If there is a task I have to finish, I think about that. Not sure if it is because I fall asleep thinking about those things, when I wake up I am tired. I don’t think I have woken up feeling refreshed lately.

Out of the dreams you had recently, are there any that are memorable?

It’s a dream I had today. I dreamt of having a fight with Jin. I see Jin often and it was interesting to see Jin even in my dream. In the dream, I was cooking with Jin but the food that we cooked failed. So we both had a bewildered look on our faces but suddenly at that moment I woke up. Usually I tend to forget my dreams completely after a while but today’s dream felt so clear.

Is there a dream that you do not want to wake up from?

I have dreams where I am having a good rest. Those times I really don’t want to wake up from it. I have had dreams often lately and it felt really nice when I am resting comfortably in my dream.

If you were able to go to another dimension, do you have any place you would like to go to?

I think anywhere, it would be nice. It wouldn’t be bad to leave with no destination and come back when you are tired. The pandemic was long. A lot of things are changing again right now and when it completely returns back to normal, it would be nice to go somewhere. I don’t want to specifically choose. 

If you were to look at life as one road, how far do you think you came now?

If I were to think as artist j-hope, I would say I am exactly in the half way. I am still far from reaching the end. I now need to do the rest of the half. 

Do you think you are currently standing in a crossroad of change?

Yes. I think it’s a very important time right now. I think there will be many various changes depending on the choices I make. I would need to make good choices and continue to  move forward following the choice. 

Do you believe there is a predestined fate?

I do believe that there is somewhat. But I think the answer to this question will be very different for each member. There will be those who say there isn’t. I don’t think that there isn’t one completely but also am not on the side that believes completely that there is one.

Personally, what is the most meaningful album out of the whole BTS discography? 

There are so many but if I were to choose just one, <WINGS> album which has ‘Intro: Boy Meets Evil’ that I took the role for. This album has a big meaning for me. It’s an album that overall, there were a lot of things I went for as a challenge and one that I tried hard to push myself to the next level.

Through the <WINGS> album how did you grow?

I was able to musically grow. BTS album’s intro was considered important and served as a basis for the album’s narrative. So with the thought that the intro I worked on cannot provide any harm to the album, I worked hard. Also it is not an easy job to fill a whole 3 minute with one person’s voice, and I had to lead the song with my voice. I tried to overcome those hardships. In that album it also includes my solo song ‘MAMA’. I think that’s why I think that I grew through the album. Not only music but even with dance, I tried a genre that I have not experienced before through tremendous amounts of practice. It was my first time realizing that there is something I gain if I put effort. I did early morning practices when I was young and had forgotten about it for a while, but with this album, I practiced hard at early morning practices again. I was able to feel that I was putting effort. It was a good time period and a good opportunity. 

Outro: Ego

What does this song mean to you?

I think it’s a song that can express j-hope. Whether it’s Jung Hoseok or j-hope, I think it’s a song that contains a story of ‘me’ overall. 

Early in the lyric, there is the lyric “I go back everyday, to myself back then” when is ‘back then’ that you are mentioning in the song?

“Back then” refers to the time when I was at a crossroad of change. I am asking what if there was a life of the choice that I didn’t choose. ‘If I had given up a lot of the parts, if I had just let go of everything what would have happened?’, something like that. Thinking about it makes me really thankful for the choice I made. 

Do you have a standard/criteria when you are choosing something?

In the past I chose things that are me but these days I come to think, let’s make choices that are not like me. A choice that is not like me that I can learn from. If I make choices that are me every day, of course, I might get something more helpful but I will just end up with just a person that I am. Right now, I want to try new things and realize and feel them. 

Her

What does this song mean to you?

It’s a Rap line unit song. It’s a meaningful song for me since it’s a song with another different vibe that I can show as a rapper. I also thought that it would be nice if more fans knew about this song. In the past rap line unit songs always were smashing and breaking things. (laugh) I wanted to show that there is a song with a different vibe like this.

Rap line that consists of RM-SUGA-j-hope, what kind of synergy do you believe you are making with each other?

Rap line unit’s energy is definitely special. It’s especially different during concerts. I think fans go crazy for that energy. Definitely feel that out of many units in BTS, it has a role for impact. It’s a necessary part. Doesn’t mean that the rapline unit takes a big part. But I think it’s an energy we must have and we are expressing it as a synergy. We communicate a lot about music. It is a combination that makes such a beautiful bond.  

What did you usually think about while writing this song?

I thought about fans a lot while I was writing it. It is a song that I throw a question to myself asking, ‘what effort are you putting for the fans?’ I have just listed all of them (in the song) There are a lot of things that I learned while I was writing this song, what am I giving attention to, what are parts that I want to show. That was the ‘answer’ to my ‘wonder’ in the song. 

Are there things that you are giving up to protect the love you are receiving right now?

Of course there are things that I have to give up and I actually do give them up. It is hard but I do believe it’s necessary. To maintain the love that I receive and the love I give. I believe I have to be aware of it and protect it. I don’t think I can pinpoint just one thing. 

To pull one answer, is it possible to put BTS and ARMY in a math equation?

Math is really hard for me. (Laugh) I find it the most difficult. So I don’t know things like equations well but I know the equal sign (=). ‘BTS=ARMY’ ‘ARMY=BTS’, it is the most ordinary, simple, and goes without saying but I think it’s the most important formula.

What does the album <Proof> mean to BTS?

Just looking back at the times we went through and the songs we have done would be meaningful. There are new things that I realized from parts that I have already known before. So it’s an album that is heavy but not burdening. I think it’s an album that came out at a perfect timing. While working on the album it gave me a strong feeling, ‘That’s what life is like, that’s how life seemed to be.”

Between the past, present, and future, which one do you think of as most important?

I believe the present is most important. My present self exists based on the past but the past has already passed. To change the future, I must do well in the present. With that meaning I believe that the present is most important.

The word “past” what does it mean to you?

Drawer. A drawer would be the right way to put it. Take it out when I want to take it out and see it, and some I just want to get rid of?

What is your first ever memory?

I think it was around when I was three? I have a memory of going to someone’s house and fighting with the dog in their house whose size was as big as me. It was a white puppy but I don’t know the breed. I wasn’t at the age to know well about puppies at that time. It wasn’t frightening but I think it was my first ever memory. 

Looking back at your childhood, is there something you miss?

There as a pillow that I always hugged to sleep when I was young. It was a pillow bigger than me. If I had that pillow I was able to fall asleep easily. I had it up until I was living in Manduk, Busan but it’s probably gone now. Back then I was small so the pillow felt bigger than me but I wonder if that pillow was actually bigger than me. If I look at it now, I think it’s going to be a small pillow.

What is your first meaningful place/space?

Our fourth dorm? No, first dorm. That place is the most meaningful place. 

How did that space look?

It was a place that had mosquito blood stains on the wall. I also saw a ghost while washing my hair. I was washing my hair alone and between my legs I saw a very pale skinned ankle, and that ankle walked into the room. I definitely saw it coming in from the front door shoe cabinet side but there was no sound that I could hear after it. I thought it was SUGA because of the skin tone. After washing my hair I went into the room to say hi to him and there was no one. In the dorm there was no one except for me. 

You must have gone through a lot during that time. 

I didn’t go through hard times. During trainee times, I didn’t have a lot of this and that type of worries. It was just fun. Just bought delicious things from the convenience store with the allowance I got every month. Some days I ate something even more delicious. Life like that was fun.

When was the “Moment of Proof”?

When we first won Daesang at the award show. It was really exciting. Now we are acknowledged even in other countries and receive awards but we were acknowledged by our country first. I think it was ‘moments of proof’ when we received awards like “Song of the Year’. ‘Album of the Year’, ‘Artist of the Year’ in big award ceremonies. 

Not to the world but is there something you want to prove to yourself?

Proving to my own self means that I acknowledge my own self, and I want to gain a lot of different knowledge in my head. After that then I think I would be able to finally acknowledge myself. 

In your mind, how old do you put yourself as?

For a long time I believed that I remained as a 15 year old. I came up to Seoul at that age to become a trainee. I technically started my social life from that point. However, I didn’t learn things that were helpful to live out in society but a social life to become a singer. It wasn’t that I studied nor did I collect knowledge for my inner self. So I thought that I was remaining at that age. Now, I think I am at my age. 26 year old. It would be quite a different 26 year old from those who have entered college, but I think that if you are able to talk to other people around you and you are able to communicate, isn’t that a 26 year old. I feel that way these days. I feel like my age. 

While living as BTS, do you think there was a change that made Jeon Jungkook, as an individual, more clear or faded?

I don’t try to separate Jeon Jungkook from Jungkook of BTS normally. They coexist well together. It’s all connected so it won’t separate even if I do separate it. In the end it’s all me. If I were to separate it, I would say the individual, Jeon Jungkook, is a little bit lacking. On the other hand, I think Jungkook of BTS is quite nice/cool. If you were to look at it that way, the only difference would be whether it’s me as an individual or me as a singer. So I would like to say that they are both doing well, distinctly and clearly. 

What is “myself as it is” like?

Young and lacking. Unique, all over the place, and lazy. So I think other than my outer appearance I think it’s all different. I wish I personally had confidence but I am a person who has weakness and I know those parts well myself. So it would be nice if my outer appearance and my literal self are exactly the same but that’s only half. But for this, even if I do change in the future, I won’t be identical.

Is the current ‘Me’ and the past ‘Me’ different?

It’s different but it’s not different. Of course people change but there are cases where you are holding on to the past. As I am a human after all, within the events that happened in the past whether it’s a special thing or a bad thing, I can’t easily let go of it. There is a feeling that I am staying in that past, definitely changed but I feel like nothing has changed. But that doesn’t mean that I am fixated about the past. Also the past me had a very weak mentality but the current me has gotten a little stronger. But since my ups and downs and being shaken mentally have reduced, I seem to have become a bit dull. So it’s kind of less fun now. 

Looking back, what was the darkest moment for you?

There was a moment when I wanted to give everything up and that was when it was darkest. I think because back then I was young, and had struggles on my own. But now a lot of time has passed. If that moment came right now I think I would be able to change something. But back then there was nothing I could do. The people who made the darkness into light next to me back then were the members. I think that is about all I can say about my dark moment. 

If you were to write a letter to yourself in the past, what would you want to write?

“Study some English. Tell mom that you want to study abroad.” I also want to say to practice dancing. I was confident about singing but I didn’t think that I was good at dancing, so I didn’t dance. Also, when you are young, whatever you do, you can quickly and naturally adapt to it. I think to myself, ‘should have danced and (learned) some English when you were young’. I should have gone to study abroad no matter what happened. (Laugh)

During the day, what time do you think it’s your time for yourself?

Time after work. Around 2 am? A time where you feel relaxed to sleep. A time where I want to do something more, but then again, if you do try to do something you feel like you need to go to sleep. It’s a very iffy/awkward time.

What do you like to be called the most?

I like the most when I am called by my real name because I believe that my name best describes who I am. 

If there is something in life that is an indispensable existence, what would it be?

People. Including people who I don’t know, family and members, company employees, walking by pedestrians, everyone. I believe that the reason I am able to do interviews like this is because there are people. If there are no people, I have no one to talk to when I am struggling. I don’t think I can live without, people that can comfort me when I’m lonely, a person to share my happiness with when I am happy. So I would say people.

Is there something you have been constantly telling yourself recently?

“What should I do right now?” I say this the most. I say this when I have to do something, at least when I am home but I don’t know what to do, and try to do at least anything. I am a person who thinks of the present as most important, so rather than saying let’s do something in the future, I think I ask more questions like “What should I do right now?”

How fast in km do you think you are going right now?

About the speed of a turtle. Just a slow walking speed. Will go forward, but sometimes stop, and sometimes go backwards. I want to live a life like the tortoise from <The Hare and The Tortoise> who can go slow but win everyone. Even as a person, I want to be a friend like the tortoise but I realized that it is pretty difficult.  

Is this speed something you set or a speed you are following?

I think it’s the speed that I want to go. I want to go slow and steady. I have a strong desire to do whatever it is, comfortably and continuously. However, due to circumstances and because of myself, there are many times when I was going to do this but do other things. 

If there is something you are focusing on these days, what would you say it is?

I am focusing on methods that would allow me to improve. To gain more knowledge musically and linguistically, I read a lot of books and watch the news. I also want to continue to improve about fashion too.

Which color do you think best describes you?

Purple. It’s not that I liked purple from the beginning, but while doing activities as BTS, it became a representative color so I began to like it. It is a color that settled in my heart even more because fans like it. Also it’s interestingly odd and beautiful. I don’t think there is any other color like purple. 

Is there a thought you always think about before going to sleep everyday?

I ask myself, ‘Isn’t there something that I have to order online?’ and search for something. If it’s not that, usually think about things that were a bit of shame during the day. That can lead to something that I want to do right at that moment or have times when I tell myself that I have to go to sleep right now so let me do them tomorrow. 

Out of the dreams you had recently, are there any that are memorable?

Dream about flying in the sky. Until now, I have dreamt about flying in the sky three times. I remember all of them. In the first dream, I was flying in the real world when suddenly, like a bug in a game, I went through a wall and went inside the floor. So an error was made and I woke up from my dream. In the second dream, I was flying and said “oh? This seems like a dream.’ I woke up when I realized.

This was the third time and the reason why this is the most memorable is because I was able to cast a spell on myself in the dream! For sure I knew that it was a dream. Then a friend came and told me that if I follow them and say the spell after them, I won’t wake up from the dream even if I knew that I was dreaming. So I said the spell after him, then a space with a very beautiful sky appeared. I flew in that sky. Despite knowing that I knew it was a dream but didn’t wake up. I flew for quite a while. Dreaming about flying in the sky makes me really happy. It’s more fun than rides in the amusement parks.

If you were able to go to another dimension, do you have any place you would like to go to?

Outer space. I think it would be scary but fun and exciting. Are you not curious about the space called the Galaxy? I am. 

If you were to look at life as one road, how far do you think you came now?

I’m not sure how far I have come. One thing I do know is that I am going around the roundabout. I feel like I am going round and round in an intersection with many forked roads. It feels like I went around the roundabout but I wasn’t able to exit to another road so I am going round and round the roundabout. 

If you got out of that roundabout and reached some kind of ‘door’ what do you think is behind the door?

If I passed the roundabout, It means that I have reached an end goal for one thing, Then that means I have learned something. Then It would feel like some clear outcome would come out but the reality won’t be like that. They say ‘mountain over mountain’. This mountain might be a mountain I made myself. Since I have so many things I want to learn and adopt, I probably would be going around somewhere else again.

Do you believe there is a predestined fate?

I didn’t really know when I was young but I think now I believe there is one. I think trying to go left while going right to change fate, in the end is also fate itself and everything has already been decided. Can also say it’s like a parallel universe. I see a lot of deja vu. This moment could be my past, and another me could be living in my future. I believe there are many different dimensions, and that is why I see so many deja vu. 

Are there any characters from a movie or a drama that you would like to resemble?

A character I want to resemble appearance wise, Leonardo Di Caprio, Jack from the movie <Titanic>. On the inside, I want to resemble after everyone. I think of all kinds of thoughts before going to sleep and I wonder, ‘What if everyone’s knowledge in the world comes into my head, what would happen?’ In that character wise, it would be close Tony Stark from <Iron Man>.

If you were to make a documentary about yourself, which song do you want to put on ending credit?

I don’t have a song I want to put in yet. Probably means that it hasn’t been written yet right? I want to make it in the future for sure.

Personally, what is the most meaningful album out of the whole BTS discography? 

I would say <The Most Beautiful Moment in Life pt. 1> From that album, people’s view of us changed. How would I put this, for the first time there was reaction. 

I think it was the first step to success. We won 1st in music shows, and from that point I had new goals one after the other. Also felt ‘growth’ for the first time. 

I think from that point we were able to have good synergy overall which allowed us to be on the up and up. 

Euphoria

What does this song mean to you?

It’s a song that I really like. There was a time where I mentioned this, but because it was recorded during the time when my throat was not in a stable condition so it contains a raw feeling as it is, the lyrics are really beautiful, the song is nice, just everything is good.

Is there something you put extra focus on when singing this song?

I tried to be fully immersed into the lyrics and faithfully sing according to the lyrics. I can imagine a colorful image just with the lyrics. When I sing “I can hear the sea from afar’ I will really be inside the image of hearing the sound of the sea from far away.

If you were to sing this song in acoustic version alone, when and where do you want to sing?

In front of the ocean during the sunset. Not under a red sunset but under a purple sunset sky. I want the season to be a season where the air is fresh with no humidity, smelling like the sea, and where a refreshing wind blows.

There is a lyric, ‘please don’t let go of the hand you are holding’ Have you ever held your hand out to someone or held on to the hand someone reached out?

I don’t think I ever held out my hand to someone first. Instead, I have more memories of holding the hand that someone reached out.

Have you ever experienced your own euphoria?

When you are experiencing a euphoria, I don’t think I will be able to realize during that moment. I think I will know after the time passes. If I look back and feel that I was really happy back then, then that I think is a true euphoria. Even now I have a lot of happy moments. But if I had to choose my best moment, I think I need to live my life more. 

If you were to imagine Utopia of your own, what kind of image is it?

The moment I am able to acknowledge my own self, that would be the Utopia for me. That moment could come when I reach my 60s but still if I am able to acknowledge myself, wouldn’t that be Utopia?

Between ‘a person who shows you the world you don’t know’ and ‘a person you can share the same world with’ which person is better?

I like the person who would be able to show the world I don’t know. Unknown world will be a new world, then I would be able to feel new emotions so that itself would be amazing. Sharing the same world means sharing emotions but I feel that learning about the new world is more valuable than that.

Dimple

What does this song mean to you?

It’s a song with a style I like. I especially like the melody of this song. Every time I listen to it, it brings up fans’ smiles in my head so my heart gets warm along with it.

If you were to sing this song that you recorded in 2017 again, what would be the difference/change?

My vocalization would be the biggest difference. Since the vocalization is different from then and now. And don’t you think it would be a bit easier to sing now?

Is there a difference also in expressing this song? 

I might be better at expressing myself but I don’t think my emotional state towards this song has a big difference. Within actors, there are ones that will be immersed into the character and pull all their emotions into it when acting and those who find importance in expressing more than emotions when acting. I put myself in the latter one. Rather than putting emotion into the song, I would say I put emotion on to my voice only.

What is something that flutters your heart in your daily life?

In the past I felt excitement when I had ambition for something, took action to make that into reality, and reached a result. These days, there aren’t a lot of those things happening as much as before. So I think I get excited when I meet new people. Talking with new people is the most fun. 

If you become a present for someone what kind of present would you be?

Become their friend, listen to their stories, listen to their concerns and worries, sing for them, about this much?

If there is something you need to love someone, what would it be?

Rather than preparing because you need something actually, I think you are able to love when you empty yourself within. I think you are able to have a real love when the emotion shouldn’t be overly excessive and whatever it is, it should be enough to be able to have a real love.

Between expressing your heart through talking and expressing it in words, which one are you more comfortable with?

I am not sure what I am more comfortable with, but what I would like is expressing them using a mixture of the strength of both talking and writing. Through words, I am able to deliver my feelings well. Talking can’t be organized cleanly like through words but it contains my emotion wholly.

What does the album <Proof> mean to BTS?

Hm, it feels like a small wrap up and also a start. This album feels like wrapping up something, But it’s also not the end. So it’s the last step and process before moving to the new chapter. 

Between the past, present, and future, which one do you think of as most important?

The present is the most important. There are times when I am submerged in the past, but I usually think more about how happy I am currently and how I should act right now, so I think I put the present as the most important. As for the future, my future self will deal with it. 

 The word “past” what does it mean to you?

I live with the past soaking me but I don’t tend to remember much about the hardships that I’ve gone through. I always only have good memories about the past remaining in my head. While reminiscing the good memories, I live thinking “ah, it was good back then’. I probably will always continue to live like this even in the future. So for me, the past is ‘moments that I always miss, moments that are only filled with good moments’. 

What is your first ever memory?

It was about when I was two or three, I was playing with a wireless racing car and the antenna that was on it got stuck in my eyes. So my mom saw the antenna that was hanging from my eyes, got surprised and was trying to take me to the hospital. At that time, my mom said “what do we do!” That is my first ever memory. 

There is also another interesting memory. It was when I was five. At that time, the apartment that I lived in had pink flowers that I could suck on and would taste like honey. The flower was so pretty, I said “Oh, a flower, pretty.” while walking, and a giant bumble bee flew towards me, who was very small at that time. I have a memory of running to kindergarten to get away from that bee. It was scary but the surroundings were very beautiful. 

What is your first meaningful place/space?

When I was fifteen, we lived in a two-story house. In the second floor living room there were two computers placed side by side. The left computer was my older brother’s, the right computer was mine. I used the computer often there. So that space is the most memorable place. So it’s meaningful. On Saturday, the sunray came in while I was playing a game secretly from my parents and I liked it the most when I was playing a game while feeling the sunray hit me. 

When was the “Moment of Proof”?

When I got accepted to college. Before that I was just a student who wasn’t that good at his studies, just an average student, but just with huge luck, I got accepted to college. It was the first time I got recognized by not just my family but also by people around me. 

Not to the world but is there something you want to prove to yourself?

I am not sure if it’s because I don’t really think deeply, I don’t have anything like that. I am the type of person who just does things right away if I feel like I want to do something. For example, if I want to do boxing, I don’t go to the gym in person to spar, but I’ll lightly toss my fist (around). If something pops up in my head, I will immediately ‘touch’ it, but don’t fall deeply into it. So I don’t really have thoughts of proving something to myself. 

In your mind, how old do you put yourself as?

Twenty seven, eight. Around that point, friends around the similar age range as me also don’t seem to count their age. So when someone asks my age, I don’t say how old I am, I just answer that I was born in 92. There is also the reason that I can’t remember my age well.  

While living as BTS, do you think there was a change that made Kim Seokjin, as an individual, more clear or blurred?

Up until 2-3 years ago, Jin of BTS and Kim Seokjin were separate. But from when I got in my thirties, I’m not sure if it’s because the activity period was long but Jin and Kim Seokjin merged. So Kim Seokjin, the individual, faded for quite a long time and became clear again when he merged with Jin. 

How similar is your usual self in your daily life compared to the BTS member (you are) shown to the world?

I think it is about 95% similar. It would be different based on who it would be. To those who can accept me / get along when I act the same, I will be seen as similar. To people who can’t go along with it/ can’t accept it well, it will look different. But even with that, I think myself and myself in real life are almost the same.

When do you find yourself as “yourself” the most?

When I talk about really unnecessary trivial things, the situation when someone would go along with that talk, I find myself as myself the most.

What is “you yourself as it is” like?

Person who is always mischievous, does not really like serious stuff, and talks a lot of trivial things. I think I am the type of person who lives towards a direction where I can personally be happy rather than living with deep thoughts and debates.

Is the current ‘Me’ and the past ‘Me’ different?

It’s very different. The ‘Me’ in the past was always very pessimistic. I was busy thinking about unfortunate / unhappy things. The current ‘Me’ lives without those thoughts. Even if there is not a very good thing happening I would just think ‘It can happen’ and don’t really think much about it. The irony is, even if I am happy I don’t think happiness lasts that long. Even if there is a good thing, rather than being really happy about it, I also pass it as not a very big deal. Because, I believe that another moment of happiness will come again next time. My personality itself changed.

Is there something you put effort into, to make yourself more clear?

I don’t necessarily put my effort into it but, l think just living like this itself is making my life more clear. I think if I were to live more seriously and oppressively, my colors would be blurred. 

Is there something that doesn’t change?

My handsome face? Being such a consistent person as always also doesn’t change. (laughs)

Who would be the person that would be able to talk about you well the most?

I would say, myself? For me, my personality changes a lot depending on who’s dealing with me. If someone accepts my pointless talk, I continue the conversation. I would also have serious talks to match with the other person as well. So I think it would be hard for someone else to say exactly what type of person I am. 

Looking back, what was the darkest moment for you?

It was around the “Fake Love” era. I think it was a timing where the members were all a little bit exhausted. The schedules were tight, and with many different reasons. I think we were lacking the time to rest and think. But, there were times when we were able to sometimes get some rest time and those days seemed like light to me. 

If you were to write a letter to yourself in the past, what would you want to write?

Myself in the past would be doing well on their own. So I see the necessity to send him something. But, if I were to write something, I think I would write, “enjoy the present, enjoy the situation.”

During the day, what time do you think it’s your time for yourself?

I consider the moment I sit in front of the computer after I get off work, is my time, but because the time of getting off work is different every time, I can’t specify.

If there is something in life that is an indispensable existence, what would it be?

Of course, the fans are people who are very necessary and precious to me, so I will not mention them specifically in detail. Next, would be my computer and phone. Without it my life won’t function well. So, I will pick my computer and my phone.   

How fast in km do you think you are going right now?

30km? For a moving car, it’s a pretty slow speed. I think currently I am going at a speed where I can look around at everything relaxed. The actual speed, I think, is going fast at 80-100km but, it’s most likely because of my personality I am not accepting it as that big. So, there is a difference in the speed that I feel.

Do you have a belief that you uphold firmly?

‘Let’s live lightly. That’s how you will feel happy in the present’  

If there is something you are focusing on these days, what would you say it is?

There isn’t anything that I am able to say I am focusing on. But, there is a lot that I’ve been ‘touching’. I’ve touched tennis, been touching piano once in a while, I’ve touched a little bit of getting to work by bicycle, and touched little bits and bits of working on songs. I tend to just move into action when there is something in my head that pops up that I feel like I want to do.

Is there a thought you always think about before going to sleep everyday?

During the days I rest, I think “ah, I lived a very peaceful day today as well.” Then I fall asleep with a very proud heart. It would mean that I have given myself a real rest that day. Every person’s standard of actual full rest is different. It will depend on what you are satisfied with. For me, real full rest is spending my time meaninglessly and calmly. That is when I feel proud.

Out of the dreams you had recently, is there any that is memorable?

I don’t think there is one. I don’t tend to have many dreams and even if I do have one, I forget everything. Ah! These days I have a dream about sleeping when I am sleeping. If I am sleeping on the bed, I dream about sleeping on the bed, if I am sleeping in the car, I have a dream about sleeping in the car.

If you could leave to go somewhere right now, where would it be?

A warm forest where a sunray comes in and there are no bugs. A forest where I can sleep on grass, I think a forest like that would be good.

Which color do you think best describes you?

I think pink. In the past I did have moments when I thought the color was burdening. But seeing fans liking moments where I looked good in outfits, music videos, or places that had pink in, I started liking it too. It is a color that I personally slowly liked because fans liked it. 

If you were to put yourself as a scent, which scent would it be?

It would be a comforting scent. I do think that my personality is shown as a person who is not very picky and so I’m portrayed to others as a comfortable image. So a scent where many people can feel comfort.

If you were to look at life as one road, how far do you think you came now?

I think I’ve reached about 80%. I think that in my lifetime I won’t have such a spectacular time again than what I am currently living in right now. I feel that the time I am able to enjoy the enormous honor as BTS is right now. Few years back I also thought that it was right that moment, 2 years ago I also thought that it was right that moment so it has been constantly ‘right this moment’. I think the ‘right now’ is continuing. 

If there is a door at the end of this road that you are passing, what do you think is behind the door?

Guess there will be another new life/third life? My first life was when I was a student, my second life is life as BTS. So I think after that, there will be another new road as BTS and as Kim Seokjin. I like things laid back. So perhaps I would be living my life like that, enjoying and being lazy. But I think I would still be working. If I don’t work, it’s boring and would feel insecure.

Do you think you are currently standing in a crossroad of change?

1-2 years ago I was. I no longer think negative thoughts, that is the biggest change in my lifetime. I didn’t necessarily have a moment/motivation. I just naturally changed as time passed.

Do you believe there is a predestined fate?

Yes, I believe there is. But, I also think that even that fate can change little by little; depending on how you act, how hard you put effort, and what kind of choices you make.

If you were to make a documentary about yourself, which song do you want to put on ending credit?

I would like “Spring Day”. There is this image of cherry blossom flowers fluttering down that this song gives. If I were to put this song in, it can bring up the image of that and I think the message of “I lived a very good life, it was a touching life. Lived a life like a movie.” can be expressed well through it.

Personally, what is the most meaningful album out of the whole BTS discography? 

I would say, the album that had “Spring Day”, <YOU NEVER WALK ALONE>. I really think that it is really hard for songs like “Spring Day” to come out. No matter how good a song is, if time passes you tend to forget, but the songs in this album, I feel that it’s good every time I hear it. So, I personally think it’s an album that has a meaning to me.

MOON

What does this song mean to you?

For a while, for my solo songs I did songs that were serious and heavy. So I wanted to give an image change since I thought people thought I only did songs that were heavy. It’s a song I worked hard making because I wanted to do a song that was bright. I feel more special about it as the lyrics were also well written while thinking about the fans and me. 

How did you feel when you first heard this song?

Usually I have the same feeling when I receive my solo songs, and this song I also thought ‘it’s good’. I like it because it’s bright!

Back then and now, did your impression about the song change?

When I first heard it, my heart beat hard but I’m not sure if it’s because I heard it too much so the beating is not as hard now. (laugh) But the image I feel about it is still similar. At first when I just heard the melody, it gave me a ‘green green’ bright feeling, and now after the lyrics got added those images got darker and the image of moonlight shining in between the scenery pops up into my head. Walking down those roads and I see the bright green trees again and see myself who is walking on that road. I am liberal arts major. (laugh)

In the lyrics ‘Moon’ has an image of shining alone but hiding its scars, ‘Earth’ has an image of one that in many ways accepts everything, having two opposite images, which one ‘Moon’ or ‘Earth’ do you see yourself more closer to?

Moon. Mood is very beautiful when you look from afar but if you see it through an astronomical telescope you are able to see the scars on the back of the moon. I also want to only show beautiful sides to people, like the Moon’s front view. I want to hide the other side. So I think I am closer to ‘Moon’. ‘Earth’ is pretty when you look from afar and when you look up close as well. I want to shine moonlight when the Earth is dark.

When was the moment you shine the brightest?

The moment when many people are watching me. So, I think I would say concert. That moment, I believe I am already experiencing it, many multiple times.

Are you more of a type that takes care of others or someone who gets taken care of?

I am neither. I am a type that says I do my part myself and you do your part on your own. So, getting taken care of by someone is a little uncomfortable for me. I feel that I am more comfortable with doing things myself whatever it is. I’m the type that is most comfortable taking care of my own self. 

To people around you, which one do you think you are, more of  ‘a person who can talk about dreams’ or ‘a person I can share my thoughts and concerns’? 

I think ‘a person who can talk about dreams’. Someone who can talk about dreams can talk about nonsense continuously. You can go to the end of the world with just talks like that. (laugh) But if you were to share real life concerns, we will have to talk about serious things, and the atmosphere gets heavy. So, I don’t tend to have those types of conversations. 

Jamais Vu

What does this song mean to you?

I did perform this song once through an online concert but it’s a song that was a little bit of a shame that I got to only show the performance once. When I was preparing for this performance, j-hope, Jungkook, and I talked about some trivial things in the interview. Saying while doing the choreograph, what if the stage goes up to the sky while the beanstalk from <Jack and the Giant Beanstalk> goes up to the sky and as I fall from it I do an adlib. (Laugh)

Recently did you have an experience where something that you are used to felt very unfamiliar?

I didn’t have experience where something familiar felt unfamiliar but I did have experience where unfamiliar things felt familiar. Like people who I wasn’t comfortable with now feel comfortable. For example, people like Bang Sihyuk PD and the board members, when I approach them familiarly, I do think, ‘was our relationship like this, they were difficult (to approach) before.’ 

While being BTS, were there a moment where you felt something was unfamiliar/strange?

I didn’t have any because BTS is just my life. If anything, if I quit BTS that would be the most unfamiliar/strange feeling for me. 

Did you have experience having trial and error?

There are things that I would know myself, “this is definitely something I shouldn’t do”, For example, I have thoughts like “If I eat this I would gain weight” But can’t help it. Are there specific solutions to that? You just live eating what you want and do things that you want to do.  

If you were a character in a game, what would your level be?

I would be a pro. I would have probably hit “max” level. So I would try when there is new content in the game, find events that are hidden in little corners of the game, or be helping out a newbie.

Between ‘someone who you can share happiness’ and ‘someone who you can share your loneliness/sadness’ which do you like more?

A ‘person you can share happiness’. When you share happiness it’s good. It’s good to have conversations like, “You were able to achieve that? That’s amazing” You can also turn sadness/loneliness to happiness! If you were to give a game as an example, if someone’s item broke, not my own, I can laugh and say “I am feeling so happy because your item exploded(broke)”. Then you can share anything as happiness.

What does the album <Proof> mean to BTS?

I think that <YOU NEVER WALK ALONE> album was the first wrap out of many stages that we took to mature. With that, I think <Proof> album is an album that we could comprehensively wrap up all the growth stages that we were lacking. As we include various messages, unreleased songs that we like, after many considerations. Now I think we can move on to the next.

Between the past, present, and future, which one do you think of as most important?

In the past, I thought the future was more important because I knew exactly what I was dreaming about. More than thinking about what kind of situation I was in right now, I thought more about what I should do to look even better in the future. But now I think ‘present’ is more important. I don’t think that the past of me is that important either.

The word “past” what does it mean to you?

I think it’s something that can hold/support my present self. 

What is your first ever memory?

This is a memory that grazed my mind one day. I think I was around two years old, I slightly remembered my father putting me on top of a green table and taking a picture. So I asked my mother if it was right, and my mother showed me the picture and asked me how I was remembering it. I think that would be my first ever memory.

Another strong memory is, I moved when I was five and at that time I was holding a rice cooker. My job was to hold the rice cooker. At that time I was very excited but it was later on when I found out that we had to move because our family situation wasn’t good. My younger self was just excited holding the rice cooker by himself.

Is there something you miss from life when you were young?

When we shot the music video for ‘Permission to Dance’, we shot it with little kids. During that time, I just said ‘I’m tired’ and the little kids hugged me. That moment, I thought that I would have had times when I was like this too. I miss the untainted pure innocence, beauty, and such. 

What is your first meaningful place/space?

Practice room. There was a practice room that I used to dance in when I was in middle school. Coming up to high school, I had the dance room, during when I was a trainee, I had the practice room that many of our fans know. Because the practice room is the place I first started my dream, the practice room, the start of it, pops into my head first. 

When was the “Moment of Proof”?

When I got confirmed as being a member of this team. I think that was luck. So proving that I have the qualification as a member of this team is an important task of proof. 

If I can prove it, I think that moment would be ‘Moment of Proof’ but I still need to go through it so I am not sure when that moment will come.

Not to the world but is there something you want to prove to yourself?

I ask myself a lot, ‘Could I be more cool/awesome?’ For me, that is a very important part. Can I be better, do better, become more cool. I want to be confident in myself with the answers to those questions. 

In your mind, how old do you put yourself as?

I think I’ve been remaining as a 19 year old. I wasn’t able to attend my high school graduation nor was I able to experience college life properly. So I think I feel like I’m just remaining at that age. It still hasn’t sunk in yet that I have become an adult. 

While living as BTS, do you think there was a change that made Park Jimin, as an individual, more clear or blurred?

I think it’s been blurred out for quite a long time but I think recently it has been becoming more clear. If I were to blatantly say it, I think even parts that I have trouble understanding myself are becoming more clear. 

Looking back, what was the darkest moment for you?

There were too many moments that it’s hard to choose just one. There is a saying that goes ‘The answer is within you’ and I believe in that. Looking back, in the end, I think I overcame those literal dark moments. Only you yourself knows why you are having a hard time and the problem is, it’s hard to recognize the issue. No matter who you ask around you, they won’t be able to give you an answer because the answer is within you. Of course until I was able to find the answer that was within me, people around me were with me by my side. I was able to find the way to the answer in me by talking with others. 

If you were to write a letter to yourself in the past, what would you want to write?

“Work harder. You are not working hard. Just know that.” People tell me that I am a hard working person but I am not too sure. Personally I have many points that are a little disappointing. So I think that ‘I am still just not enough’

During the day, what time do you think it’s your time for yourself?

I think it is early morning time. I sleep really late. These days I sleep at 9 in the morning. It’s not that I can’t sleep. When I do fall asleep, I usually sleep for a long time but I have schedules and such that I end up sleeping late. The reason why I like the morning hours is because of their calm silence. I like spending time of my own in the silence when everyone is sleeping, so I feel like that time is a time of my own.

How similar is your usual self in your daily life compared to as the BTS member (you are) shown to the world?

I would say I’m about 85% similar. I don’t think that it’s bad at all that there are differences. It’s not wrong either. In fact, I think that it’s the right thing to be like that and also feel that it’s better. But I’m also not very good at showing the different side of me too. More than saying the remaining 15% is ‘different’ I would say ‘I haven’t shown it yet’ is more correct. But that 15%, I also think it’s a side that I am not able to show.

What is “you yourself as it is” like?

Just ordinary. It’s really just ordinary. 

Is the current ‘Me’ and the past ‘Me’ different?

My personality changed. I was introverted but I changed to a little extroverted. My MBTI also happened to change from ENFJ to ESTJ. I think I naturally just changed as the job we have involves being active. If I hear others talk too, it seems like there are a lot of people whose personalities changed as they worked. I think I’m the same.

What are things that changed and things that haven’t changed as time went by?

I think everything besides the feeling that I have for this job changed. Whether it’s the situation or what. About changes, I honestly feel half positive and half negative. It has always been half and half and it is still the same. 

Do you have a belief that you uphold firmly?

“Express your feelings” I think I do anything that can express my feelings. I think I have been keeping that well. 

Who would be the person that would be able to talk about you well the most?

Members. Members are people who know about things that I can’t even talk to my family about.

What do you like to be called the most?

I like it the most when I am called by my name. I never particularly like, liked my name, but I think they have given me a good name that people can easily remember. 

If there is something in life that is an indispensable existence, what would it be?

Cell phone. Going through the pandemic, I realized once more how important cell phones are. It was the only medium to communicate with other people. If it wasn’t for cell phone it would have been hard to talk to people. It was my only thing that became my friend during the hard times in the pandemic. 

Is there something you have been constantly telling yourself recently?

I legit say “what should I eat” a lot. I believe that that question belongs to one of the 3 conundrums of the world. In the past I didn’t ask these kinds of questions. It was questions like “Am I ok these days?”  These days I don’t really get interested in other people that much. I focus on what I should eat. I think it might be because I can afford more room for myself. 

How fast in km do you think you are going right now?

A light, not tiring running speed for an average adult male? About 17km I’d say? I think I am running where I am not being dragged or pushed. Running while I slowly adjust my own speed. 

Out of the dreams you had recently, are there any that are memorable?

In the dream, I was with my friends in my room. Time was before the sun went down, there was sunset. The orange light came into my room, some of my friends were lying down, others were sitting down having a conversation. Was comfortably having a conversation. In my dream I didn’t think it was a dream. It was that comfortable which made it a very interesting dream. It ended without much going on. It was just a normal daily life dream that had nothing special, but in fact, that is why I liked it more.

Is there a dream that you do not want to wake up from?

Dream about flying in the sky. I fly very often in my dream. I feel really happy.  I wish all people could see this dream together. It feels very free. Also when I dream about flying I’m inside a beautiful scenery. A scenery that you cannot see in real life, something that just doesn’t make sense. Feel kind of like I have become Iron Man?

Are there any characters from a movie or a drama that you would like to resemble?

Iron Man. The person, how should I put it, he’s very tough. He’s also cool and awesome. There is no way even if my personality changes I would have a personality like that. No matter how extroverted I become, there still will be some introverted side of me that is left. I would like to try being a person like that once because I won’t be able to become someone like that. I envy people like Iron Man.

If you could leave to go somewhere right now, where would it be?

Any place where I could see the ocean. It could be Jeju Island or even abroad. It would be nice if for a few days I can just sit at a place where I can see the ocean.

If you were to look at life as one road, how far do you think you came now?

I think I am in a place that I don’t know at all. It’s not that I lost my way. I don’t have a forked road in my path. Though I have few obstacles…

If there is a door at the end of this road that you are passing, what do you think is behind the door?

I never thought that there would be something at the end of the road. But if there is, I hope people who I like are there. 

Do you think you are currently standing in a crossroad of change?

Yes, so it’s interesting. I wasn’t really particularly interested in things like MBTI. But doing it made me realize that my personality did change a lot. There are many times where I answer the same questions differently. So I think to myself ‘I am getting older.’, ‘I am becoming more of a realistic person.’

Do you believe there is a predestined fate?

I am the type that believes choices are made by myself. So I don’t really like things like destiny. If there is fate I think I would think “Then why am I doing all this.” 

If you were to make a documentary about yourself, which song do you want to put on ending credit?

Bruno Major’s ‘Nothing’. I think the mood of the song goes well with me very well.

Which color do you think best describes you?

Sky Blue. When I was young, my mother used to tell me while she was putting clothes on me that I matched sky blue well. So it’s a color I like. Sky blue is also a color that feels peaceful. 

If you were to put yourself as a scent, which scent would it be?

I would like a light scent. Rather than an artificial scent, I think a simple and light scent would suit me well.

Personally, what is the most meaningful album out of the whole BTS discography? 

I would say <The Most Beautiful Moment in Life> Series. That was the time where members all had the most thoughts. Personally, moving on to my twenties, I started feeling insecurities for unknown reasons, and it’s an album that went with me from the start of those feelings to a point where I was able to organize my thoughts. I cried the most and I laughed the most.

Through the <Proof> album, what message do you want to deliver?

For the last few years I believe that there were many messages that we screamed out, and that our fans screamed out. But there were almost no moments where we were able to talk. So through  this album I hope we can have more deep conversations. Rather than us delivering a story one sided. I hope we share stories together. 

FILTER

What does this song mean to you?

I believe it’s a song that best expresses myself. Even if the situation changed and my personality changed, the feeling of wanting to show this side of me to others didn’t change. I put a lot of those feelings into it. 

If you look back in time what type of filter do you think is overlaid on your memories?

Filter of film camera. Feels like a camcorder filter is also on it. Probably because it’s a memory. 

There is a lyric ‘mix the colors in the palette’. Which color do you think yourself is right now?

Whatever color it is, I feel like it would be watery. Light color. If I put it this way I am worried people might think depressingly but it’s not that. I feel that it used to be a more contrasted color. Now it should get brighter again. I should put on colors. Adding more painting to it! Been thinking that I should put more passion these days. 

Are there filters of your own that you have not been able to show yet?

Yes. There are a lot. If I were to say the filters that I have shown so far as colors, I think there was only red, blue, and yellow. I think I’ve shown about half of it. There is still way more left to show you. 

The moment you are fully immersed on stage, how do you feel?

I feel like I’m in a trance. As if I came to a completely different world? I think it’s because I’ve become fully immersed in it. When that happens, nothing else comes into my mind. Since I was young,  I’ve stood on stage because I liked that feeling. I still do. 

If you had ‘Genie’s Lamp’ and you were about to make three wishes, what kind of wish would you make?

First, please grant me a hundred more wishes. From the second wish I would ask every small thing. Small things like ‘Give me wings to fly in the sky’. ‘Please let my body be free from toxics.’ ‘Please let me not gain weight.’ ‘Please stop my age at 28.’ ‘Please give me a trial ticket for a supercar.’ For this, you can just give me a free trial ticket.(Laugh) ‘Please give me the power to heal people.’ Because health is the best. ‘Please give me the power to teleport.’ ‘Please allow me to breathe in outer space.’ ‘Please allow me to not feel heat and cold.’ ‘Please allow me to be okay from not sleeping.’ ‘Please let me sing well.’ ‘Please let me become the best dancer in the world.’ 

Friend

What does this song mean to you?

It has a big meaning as it’s my first song that I participated in producing. It is also a song that I really like.

What is a definition of soulmate to you?

There is nothing that can define it but a relationship where there is nothing you want from each other? I think that’s what a soulmate is. A relationship where you are not expecting anything from each other.

If you can just have one day with your friend that you can spend freely, how are you going to spend your time?

Wake up around 4 pm. Then eat. Walk a little outside. Then play games. Then have a drink. I often spend time with my friends like this. I can spend a whole week like that. 

Are there other memories where you felt that V was your soulmate?

There was a time when we performed at Zepp Fukuoka in Japan for a tour.

It was a venue where the capacity was about 1k seats. The hotel we stayed at back then was right next to Fukuoka Dome. I snuck out with V saying “we should go to the dome!” Like that, the two of us went out, bought a bunch of stuff from the convenience store. I think it was really good back then. I feel that because there are memories like that I like to think that he is my soulmate. 

Which are you more familiar with, taking care of others or being taken care of by others?

I am more familiar with taking care of others. I just become like that. And I tend to take care of others in detail. 

Out of all the memories you have as BTS, if you were to pick one that feels like a dream, when would that be?

I can’t pick out just one moment. In videos that the company makes or edits, there are ones where they go over BTS’ history. Every moment that would be moments in those types of videos are dream-like moments. When we debuted, when we first held our concert at Olympic Gymnastic Arena. When we went on a tour, and the trips with members that we had in between, all those moments. 

What does the album <Proof> mean to BTS?

I think it’s an opportunity to look back at the times that passed, and look forward to the bigger future of BTS. When the moment comes where fans can look at this album and have a sincere and honest talk with us, I think we will be able to feel a bigger meaning for each other.